The 10 Most Important Life Lessons I’ve Learned The Hard Way Over The Years
1. Failure Is Absolutely Necessary
If you were incredible at everything you did, your life would be monotonously mundane. The people around you wouldn’t be able to relate, as they are likely flawed. Your isolation from experience in a way isolates you from the rest of society. The prospect of failure makes reaching the finish line so much more rewarding; you need to learn to embrace criticism. You need to experience growth.
I've had my failures and my successes, my ups and downs. I've learnt to grow into myself, albeit not the perfect person i envisioned myself to be when i was younger. i'm not ashamed to admit that i've massive flaws as a person and in my character. i embrace criticism but at the same time have learnt that criticism is only as much as the party who so feels the need to deal them out and only a single opinion. i accept constructive criticism and ignore the ones that i do not think is of any significance.
2. Nothing Will Change You Like Heartbreak Will
Heartbreak coerces people to evaluate themselves and reflect deeply. While a broken heart will mean something different for every person, it will be the most pivotal force in changing a person. Unfortunately, it’s likely to happen more than once — and it’ll sting every single time.
Yes, heartbreak is one thing in life that nothing can cure. in time, they may fade a little like physical scars but they are permanent and remain with you for life. you can only learn to accept that it was an incident that had happened and you can either accept it and move on or sit and dwell on it. every time i have my heart broken, i evolve, sometimes contributing to building my personal strength and making a part of me a better person and in some ways making me a harder, more cynical and killing a part of me. if you've never experienced heartbreak, you may have a more glossed view of life but you'd never be a fully grown person.
3. Love Sickness Is The Best Diet
Nothing rids you of appetite like picking up the pieces to your heart after someone’s splattered it across the walls. But be mindful, you absolutely should not starve yourself; it’s destructive and won’t make you feel better.
My weight fluctuates in cycles, sometimes due to what one would call love sickness. the empty gut that feels like it's been wrenched out through your throat and makes every single thing in life unappetising is nowhere near pleasant and can most definitely be self-destructing.
4. Don’t Be Reckless With Your Heart Or Anyone Else’s
It doesn’t matter how poorly things went in your relationship; a heart is a precious thing and it should be handled with care. There will be times when you give your heart to the wrong person, and there will be times when that wrong person is you. Do your part and be delicate.
5. Pity Is The Worst Thing You Could Give Anyone
If you’re staying in a relationship — whether romantic or platonic — because the other person is going through something and it would “kill them” if you left, you’re doing the person a disservice. You have someone under the illusion that you’re there because you want to be, when in reality, you’re there because you feel obligated.
i do not pity. i have empathy. well, potatoes, potaatoes right? but it's somehow an idiosyncrasy in me to always want to be there for the one i love and to somehow make a difference. perhaps it could be a sickness in me, a need to make a difference somewhere to make up for the lack of accomplishment in other parts of my life or perhaps because i've had the privilege of a good upbringing and amazing family. perhaps i feel the need subconsciously to help that someone experience the happy part of my life.
6. Disappointment Is Nausea Of The Mind
With sadness comes grief, but eventually acceptance will lead you back on the road to happiness. Maybe reality didn’t meet your expectations, or people didn’t meet your expectations. Regardless, when things feel amiss and expectations are not met, it can be tough to recreate opportunity.
i've missed all too many opportunities all because i try to make up and recoup the disappointments and losses that i've had. not the best moves i've made and too many a time, made me an altogether unhappy person. it's a lesson i know i've learnt over and over again but most often than not, i do not "do it right" the next time. i make the same mistakes and make the same wrong moves time and again. it can never be justified and perhaps it's destroying my future but what do i do? head over heart?
7. The Hardest Thing To Gain Back Is Trust
Once you’ve lost your trust in someone, or someone’s lost it in you, you either move on or fight to regain what once was. If you don’t care enough to gain the trust back, walk away because it’s tough work. Guilt may eat at you, but if your motivation for mending comes from selfishness, it’s not worth anyone’s time to try.
trust can never be regained once lost. you can only try to accept that what you do not know doesn't hurt and move along.
8. Apologies Are For You, Not Them
This isn’t as selfish as it sounds; it’s just that important to recognize your wrongdoing to promote personal growth. Take responsibility for your actions and doing the right thing. Forgiveness is not the purpose of an apology, although it’s always welcomed. Additionally, there will be times in life when an apology will not suffice. That’s the other person’s choice, not yours. More importantly, you need to forgive yourself. Accept that you’ve done what you can to right your wrong and move forward with your life.
move forward. apologies are only words. take responsibility, yes. but it doesn't mean that the cause will never occur again.
9. Honesty Is The Best Policy
Despite how clichéd it may seem, it’s the truth. It’s important to seek and expect the truth. You feel best about yourself when you’re honest.
this, i do not agree. secrets have been and always will be part of everybody's life, even to the most important person in your life. be honest but some things are better left untold and unknown. even if it may not be correct, you have to protect yourself and the one you love. sometimes, the truth hurts more than the lie you tell and the secrets you keep.
10. Your Parents Were Probably Right About Everything
I used to be the queen of passive-aggressive deviance, but my parents were right about pretty much everything: the people from whom I should have stayed away, the things that really matter in life, the things I would regret and potential consequences.
most parents always want the best for their kids and try to be right and most of the time insist that they're right. again, it's just a person's view. parents are from another era and parents are just people. they are entitled their views on what's right and wrong, what's good and not but if we look at them as another subject, it's going to be the same. listen and judge on your own terms. please them out of obligation and respect and if i disagree, if it's not essential enough, i nod along but do what i want anyway. i admit, i've been disagreeable and at times even disrespectful. i'm not proud of the child that i am at times and i do feel guilty and apologetic. i can't make excuses for myself but my head and heart may have been so displaced in ways that are not even their doing that i do not know how to make the effort to be a better child to my parents.
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